Why Most Leaders Get Stuck – And How to Break Through
The Decision-Making Trap No One Talks About
I’ve spent years working with leaders who, from the outside, seem decisive and confident. People assume that if you run a company, manage a team, or have years of experience, you just know how to make the right call every time.
That’s a myth.
I’ve worked with CEOs, founders, and senior executives who felt utterly paralysed by big decisions—whether to invest, pivot, restructure, or walk away from something that no longer served them. The common theme?
It wasn’t the decision itself that was hard. It was the fear of getting it wrong.
And I know this firsthand.
I always thought I was good at making decisions. I moved quickly, relied on instinct, and rarely hesitated. I’d read Blink by Malcolm Gladwell and thought, That’s me, I thin-slice decisions and trust my gut.
But looking back, I realise that was only half the truth.
Because when it came to the really tough decisions—career changes, personal challenges and many others, I often got stuck. And when I got stuck, I stayed stuck for quite a while.
Should I leave this job? I sat on the decision for months.
Should I invest in this opportunity? I overanalysed it to death.
Should I have that tough personal conversation? I kept waiting for the ‘right time’, which, of course, never came.
The worst part? I knew that not deciding was a decision in itself. But I couldn’t even commit to that.
I don’t leave much room for regrets, but with hindsight, I know I could have handled many of those decisions, or non-decisions differently.
The Hidden Force Behind Indecision: F.E.A.R.
A coach I know, Alf Dunbar, shared a quote that stuck with me:
F.E.A.R. has two meanings:
Forget Everything And Run.
Face Everything And Rise.
Every leader I’ve worked with has, at some point, done both.
I’ve seen incredibly intelligent, successful professionals forget everything and run, from difficult conversations, from uncertainty, from the fear of failure. I’ve seen others face everything and rise, taking action even when they weren’t 100% sure they were making the right call.
What separates the two?
It’s not intelligence. It’s not experience.
It’s having the right balance between thoughtful reflection and the ability to move forward.
Because while action can break indecision, action without clarity is just movement, not progress.
The 3-Step Clarity Framework: A Balanced Approach to Decision-Making
I work with leaders who need to make tough decisions, without overthinking themselves into exhaustion or rushing in blindly.
Here’s the three-step process I now use when making decisions (and one I coach leaders through every day):
1️. Zoom Out
Imagine yourself five years from now.
What decision would you be most proud of making today?
This isn’t about forcing an answer—it’s about shifting your perspective. Often, decisions that feel overwhelming in the moment become clearer when we step back.
2️. Separate Fear from Risk
Fear and risk are not the same.
Ask yourself: ‘What’s the real worst-case scenario? Can I handle it?’ (Chances are, yes.)
Most of the time, fear distorts our thinking and makes problems seem bigger than they actually are. But that doesn’t mean all hesitation is unfounded—sometimes our instincts are telling us to slow down and get more information.
3️. Take the Right First Step
Clarity doesn’t come from any action, it comes from the right action.
If you had to move forward in the next 24 hours, what’s one step that would give you more clarity rather than just forcing momentum?
This could be having a conversation, gathering one more key piece of information, or setting a decision deadline to avoid dragging it out indefinitely.
The key isn’t to just ‘decide and go.’ It’s to make sure that when you move, it’s with a level of confidence, even if that confidence is just in your ability to adapt.
Final Takeaway: Thoughtfulness + Movement = Clarity
I’ve made some brilliant decisions. I’ve also made some terrible ones. But the worst ones? The ones I didn’t make at all.
And if there’s one thing I’ve learned in coaching leaders through tough calls, it’s this:
The answer isn’t waiting for the ‘right’ decision. It’s creating clarity by combining perspective with action.
Or, as Martin Luther King Jr. put it:
“You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”
If you’re stuck in a decision right now—whether it’s business, career, or personal—what’s one step you could take today to bring more clarity, not just more movement?